Worthiness (3/26/2013)

There is something that I have been struggling with, and I have been struggling with this for a long time. How do I go about fulfilling my Divine Mission? Where do I truly start? Where do I look for the resources I need? Where will they come from? As many times as I went within to ask the questions, I came out with answers that were clearly misinterpreted. But then, I may have also been asking the wrong questions. See, in the life of a mystic – actively living in The Spirit – you have to be very specific. Whether you are asking a question or doing magickal works in order to fulfill a personal desire or purpose, you have to pretty much lay everything out in detail – you have to be very particular.

I see now that I was a bit more focused on whether things were going to happen at all than on what I needed to do to make them happen. Yes, I have the talent and skills needed to carry out my Work, but I still need various resources and opportunities. I have spent much of my time wondering how I was going to get to these opportunities – more so if they would happen at all. Now I see that my focus was on the wrong thing; I should have focused on what opportunities were going to come up, and from where should I be open to them coming from. I have spent many days and weeks reading horoscopes and interpreting my own dreams. I’ve meditated and prayed on this issue, but I simply did not see what was in front of me. What I held in my very own hands.

A few days ago, my horoscope stated that I am searching for a special resource, and I would need to calm down and not be too picky about what it was I needed, for the resource woud be something that I already I had. And lo! I happened to go searching through a resource of mine and found what it was that I was looking for. I had it all along, and refused to look at what I had for fear of being unworthy of taking full advantage of this resource. I didn’t think I was too good to put my efforts toward this way of doing things, but I thought that I was not good enough – I thought that there may not have even been an open opportunity for me. And then I saw it – I saw my window of opportunity. I saw my own reflection, and I knew that I had to seize the moment and make a move towards manifesting everything I have envisioned and hoped for.

We shall see if this gem that I found is truly the one that I am looking for. Yet, I have no doubts about the positive possibility that this is The One. How could I have incarnated on this Earth to do a specific job and not be worthy of the best resources that are available? How could I not be worthy of completing my mission with the protection, love, knowledge, and resources to be provided by a special key that I hold? Everything happens for a reason, and all things are placed in our lives to serve a purpose. My purpose is to serve – to serve Humanity and The Cosmic. I humbly go forth with my quest and fully accept and embrace my Divine Task at hand.

If you feel inspired to do something special or create something or go somewhere, follow that inspiration and make manifest! We are all worthy of everything that The Cosmic and The Earth have to offer. Let no one tell you otherwise!

Namaste!

 

Aseenah: I See Now (5/7/2012)

They say that Schizophrenia is a mental disorder that hinders a person from being able to tell the difference between real and unreal experiences. A “loss of touch with reality” is always labeled as being crazy, but what is reality to say that anyone has “lost touch” with it? How do we know that we aren’t simply experiencing multiple dimensions of one reality?  The Reality.

The New Age Movement is preaching that we are at a time of Great Change, and we are. The planet is apparently ascending into a new realm of existence, and we, humanity, are ascending along with it. This ascension, as it relates to humanity, is into the 5th dimension, an existence of Light, Love and Purity. This is a spiritual transformation that will have physical and metaphysical affects on us all. For all of my life, I have been a 4th dimensional being, waiting to fully express her Self. I not only experience this 3-D physical experience, but I connect to the spiritual realm as well. As a young one, I would often have dreams that would manifest. I would “foresee” things or events. It scared me, as I was young and did not understand what was going on, so I repressed the talent.

Now, I have come to accept my full spiritual, 4-D self. I allow myself to experience what is directly in front of me, in the physical and the metaphysical. I am moving towards the point where not only do my dreams manifest, but my thoughts manifest also. If I feel that I do not want something or someone, it manifests exactly that way. I also have experiences in which I have dreams and even write out certain events that have happened in the past.

The Will of the Ride: There was a day in which I had to go grocery shopping. I had to plan out my course of action in obtaining a ride home, as I do not drive. There is an older man that gives cheap rides that I will often call upon, but on that day, I had no real want to deal with him, as he tends to “work my nerves”. The potential downside to this feeling was that I would have had to pay more money for a cab, and I had it made up in my mind that I wanted to pay no more than $10. After I completed my shopping, I called the older man for a ride and got his voice mail. I then had my mother call for a cab, and the cab driver gave me a ride without running the meter. I was only charged $10 for the ride, just as I willed it to be.

A Channeled History: As I am working on a new novel entitled Royal Blood, I spent a whole night brainstorming what I wanted the story to be and how I wanted it to play out. I discussed it with my family and got plenty of good feedback and ideas for a epic tale. Last week, I viewed a YouTube video that had yet another alternative story of creation that actually links together all of the current ones that we know and may love today. As I was reading the scanned texts in the video, I literally read what I had written out a few weeks prior. To keep from telling my book, I will simply say that the event was uncanny, and it caused me to remember various dreams I have had over time. I now feel that I have visited past worlds, and that is if I haven’t actually lived in them.

The Dream Job: The other day, I had a dream that I was in a mall that I used to work at. I was on a job interview and my chances of getting the job were looking pretty bright. As I walked through the mall after the interview, I ran into an old friend of mine and we were talking about how things at her place of work were doing, as well as the interview I had just been on. I awakened out of my sleep wondering why I was having such dreams, as life experience through the will of The Cosmic showed me that retail was not where I needed to be. I remember saying to myself, half asleep, “Why am I dreaming of this place? Oh well, I need some money.” As I was falling back into my slumber, my phone rang. I answered, and it was a friend of mine calling me with a business proposition.

The Twin Soul: This is my hardest challenge yet. For about 6 months now, I have been racking my brain like crazy trying to figure out why I have such a connection to a man in this world that seems untouchable, at least until now. As I do more research on this young man, I find more and more similarities between he and myself. There are parallels in our interests, career choices and even our names. The first signal that there may be something beyond this 3-D limited consciousness was our middle names. Our middle names are the same word with two letters switched around. I like to think of this as the manifestation of our Yin/Yang connection, as his name is the male version of the word and my name is the female version. I began to think that maybe he was being “shown” to me and my feelings developed in the way they had, because I needed to heal myself in order to be able to connect to the Divine Love that is out in the world for me.

On a Sunday, about two weeks ago, after a day of spiritual regenerating, I had found a peace within myself and The Connection I was experiencing. I had accepted the fact that I have a connection to him that cannot be explained, and I was willing to be at peace with that and love him unconditionally. I was ready to positively let him go and be happy in his life, as he is already in a relationship that he thinks he is happy in. Just as I was affirming that I could let go in peace, a Facebook friend of mine posted a picture of this individual on my profile “wall”. This warmed my heart and I was pleased. He struck up conversation around, what I would like to believe is, the object of my infatuation. My friend brought up something about My Love’s dating life, and I double checked to make sure I was right in knowing what’s going on. Now before I continue, I must make clear that a few months ago I had daydreams about meeting My Other Half and his current girlfriend in a karaoke bar. Why a karaoke bar, I did not know. But on that Sunday when I had to double check my sources, I found an old news article saying that my Soul Twin had, in fact, met his current girlfriend in a karaoke bar. This was officially a moment that left no room for doubt.

I have “a gift”, as a friend tells me. I am more than a 3-dimensional manifestation of abstractions, and in all honesty, we all are. We all have “gifts”. We all have “special” talents. Most importantly, we all have Divine Connections to things, people and places that simply cannot be explained in a rational manner, unless one is speaking to a mystic. I have said in a previous post, Divine Purpose: The Light Worker, that my spirit body has manifested here on Earth many times, originally from a planet in the Sirius Star system. I recall a name of mine, from a past life, being Aseenah, which translates to: I See Now. I now see who I Am, and what I am capable of. I remember much, and things are becoming clearer by the day, even by the moment. I understand that I have a “gift” of Sight, and I See a lot now.

See your Self. Look for your gifts, and embrace them. I have done this for myself, and I am enjoying every moment of it, including the moments when I can’t tell what’s real and what’s not.

In the meantime, as I await the physical union of myself and my Twin, I shall share with you all a song and music video by Rihanna that seems to be VERY relevant these days. Enjoy!

Mental Manifestation (3/11/2012)

We are all Light beings, knowledgeable and powerful. The power of our mind is what makes us a bit different from the other species on this planet, but not so much different from other species in the cosmos. One thing that we all strive to gain more than knowledge is power. We want power over our selves, our lives, our environment, and often times each other. The paradox is, we want to know and have such power so badly, but when we gain that power, or activate it within ourselves, we either don’t believe it or we don’t know what to do with it.

My life has been an interesting journey, to say the least. I have seen and done many things in my time here on Earth. One thing I have done is avoid acknowledging my inner and outer natural powers. In my blog post, The Spirit of New York (11/14/2011), I elaborated on experiences that I have had with the spirit world such as hearing disembodied voices and so on. This is just once facet of my connection with other dimensions and realities. Throughout my life, I have experienced moments in which I realised that something I had foreseen in a “day dream”, or in an actual dream in the realm of sleep, had come to pass in real life. There was a physical manifestation.

For instance, when I was 16, I had a dream about going to San Francisco to see my mother in a house where my room had blue walls. At the end of 2011, an event happened and my mother’s home was repainted blue on the inside. It was painted a shade of blue close to what I saw in my dream, and my mother also had an opportunity to work in San Francisco at the time. Realising that elements from an old dream came to be a reality was an eye-opener for me to what abilities I had within my being.

In the last year or so, I have become more conscious of my ability to visualise something in my mind and then being able to create it with my hands, another physical manifestation of what I visually project in my mind. I have thought up positive things, such as a very tasty sandwich, and I have thought up negative things, such as a person who has hurt me in the past showing up at my door. This is very overwhelming as things good and bad can manifest from a simple thought. I have to be careful as this power is a bit tricky as well. There are moments when I consciously think something into existence, and there are moments when I unconsciously think something into existence. I speak things into existence as well. I can say a name or bring up a topic, and then something relevant will manifest, if not the person or thing itself.

I do not care to have power over any one other than myself. I really do not care to have power over anything other than myself. My powers are divine and they are real. They are becoming more apparent, and I am becoming more consciously aware of them, and embracing them as well. We are all Divine Beings. We all have power, knowledge and light within us. The time has come for us to fear ourselves no more. We must reconnect with Our Selves and our Greater Existence. We must believe what we see, hear, feel and experience. The time has come for us to become one with The All, and know that we are a part of something beyond what our minds can process at this time. Know Thy Self. Be Thy Self. Acknowledge your power within, and bring it without.

How Do You Know? (12/28/2011)

I have had some interesting experiences lately. I have been meeting and connecting with various people from various locations. I have experienced a new way of seeing those I have known over a long period of time, and I have experienced a new way of seeing people that I have just become acquainted with. We are all individuals. We exist in this world in our own way. We love, we hate, we yell, we debate, we disagree, we agree, we agree to disagree and so on. What we as a collective seem to lack is the ability to fully acknowledge that we are all different and that we should respect our differences.

There are many individuals that I generally observe and/or keep in contact with via social networks that I attended grade school with. I often reflect on the persons we used to be, how we portrayed ourselves, what cliques we were a part of, etc. Then I compare who we thought we were to who we convince ourselves we are now. Many of us have done a complete 180, and we are the opposite of what we used to be. Some people I know didn’t change at all, and are still going through the same cycle. Others are pretending to live a life that they don’t in order to continue a reputation that only applied to grade school standards and views. I often observe posts from individuals that put down others in their same “social group”, others judge and disown former lovers, and some even bash family members. Although we are at a different point in our lives, many things seem to have not changed. Some of us have grown mentally and spiritually, and some of us haven’t.

My most interesting experience is with the people that I am now meeting on a daily basis. These individuals are very different from those that I grew up with. Some are extremely wealthy and successful, others are generally successful, many are enlightened in their own way, but they all provide their own unique experience for me. I connect to some, and I don’t connect so well to others. In any case, there is something to be learned from them all. Some of them provide a mentor/men-tee relationship, others are generally supportive, others are judgmental in their own limited views. I have had many encounters in which some of these individuals have come off as if they think they are “above” me, or better than me. I do acknowledge that there is something to be learned from everyone, but the “authoritative teacher” position doesn’t sit very well with me. Some of them are open-minded, and some simply aren’t.

One on-going theme that I have noticed within us all is that we become so consumed with our personal beliefs that we automatically oppose a different view point without consideration. We often argue each other down before we allow ourselves to see and think beyond what we perceive to know. This is not limited to spiritual knowledge; it also includes materialism, personal relationships, family relationships, jobs, success, religion and so on. I cannot say that I am not included in this, but I can say I acknowledge it in myself. One question we should all ask each other, as well as ourselves, is How do you know? How do I know? Can we really be truly sure of anything in this day and age? I can’t be sure of that, but what I do know is that I believe in life, love, and our individual perception of all that exists and doesn’t exist. We are all unique, and we all have our own points of view. We should be more willing to listen and take in information from each other. We should be willing to learn from one another. A disagreement does not mean that one person is right or wrong; it just means that two or more people see things differently. In the grand schemem of things, what’s really so wrong with that?

 

The Example: 1 + 0 = 1 (8/3/2011)

Everyone wants to be number one. In order to attain the title of “Being Number One” or being “The Best There Ever Was”, one has to eliminate all competition. This takes time, patience, initiative, persistence, and dedication. One has to commit. One has to commit to success. One has to set goals, and then develop strategies to achieve those goals. All of life is a game, and in order to win, one must first be willing to play. A sad reality is that not everyone is meant to be a winner. Without losers, there would be no winners. With this fact in mind, it may be hard for one to keep pushing forward in times of struggle and despair. However, it is this fact that separates the winners from the losers. This fact allows one to be able to figure out if he or she is capable of making it to the top.

To persist is to continue pushing forward in spite of any obstacles, discouragement or opposition. When one is persistent, he or she is able to keep a winning mindset and work hard daily. Eliminating competition means that one has to study all of his or her opponents and continuously figure out a way to be better without doubt or hesitation. One must not be afraid to fail. Failure will occur, and it is the person that is able to learn from a failure and see a positive outlook that will make it to the number one spot. It is the individual that sees every failure as another step to success that will prevail. One must seek out failure in order to succeed. One must have the internal drive to keep pushing forward, and one must be driven to achieve greatness.

In order to be a true leader, one must set the example. One must be able to take criticism gracefully and learn from it. One must be able to fail over and over, just to find a new way that will work. One must be solution oriented. If one wants to claim that he or she is “The One”, “The Boss” or “The Leader” one must be able to keep a positive mindset. One must be able to see the positive in every negative; one must be focused on the light at the end of the tunnel. Leadership is earned. Leaders push the envelope. Leaders are not afraid to do something different from the masses and be able to stick with it. Leaders have vision, and they have belief. Leaders are the ones who come up with a phenomenal idea and do not stop until the dream is realised. Leaders are open in their minds and in their spirits. Leaders also know how to leverage other people and their talents in order to create a successful team. Leaders understand that as a team, together everyone achieves more. One must be willing to put one’s pride to the side and ask for help when looking to be the number one person.

One is a lonely number, yet the number one is the number that everyone aspires to be. Being number one means sacrifice. One will sacrifice sleep, social life, long walks on the beach, and even love in order to succeed. One can risk giving up family and friends when pushing towards the ultimate goal. There will be haters. There will be those who are close to one’s heart that will go out of their way to bring one down and let him or her know that he or she will not make it and that success is not possible. These people are the ones who are meant to be losers. They are the ones that cannot be humble enough to ask for help and admit their flaws. They are the ones that will do their best to bring one down into the negativity and gloomy outlook on life that one may have had before. These people are the ones we think about when we hear the cliche’ “Misery loves company.” It often hurts, but one must leave these people behind in order to succeed. Being number one means have a winning attitude and a winning network. There is no other way around it; the wrong vibes will completely destroy a process in the works to achieve greatness.

In order to reach the number one spot, one must be a leader. One must set the example. One must be the example. However, one must also remember that 1 + 0 = 1. One person with a vision plus zero negativity, zero competition, zero drama,  and zero losers. Can you handle being the one and only? Do you have what it takes to be number one? Are you winning?

Mindset (7/30/2011)

Where are you in life? Have you accomplished any of your personal goals? What do you have going for yourself? What are you doing? All of life is about mindset. When in the right mindset, one can accomplish much and achieve greatness. Where is your mind right now? Are there happy thoughts? Any ambitious thoughts? Or are you thinking about what you are going to wear to the club this weekend? Are you budgeting out your paycheck so that you can pop bottles in VIP? Are your bills paid? Are you investing your capital or wasting it? What are your priorities? Where is your mind?

All of life is a mind game. If one’s mind is not in the game, one will never win. Social classes don’t exist only because of income, they exist because of mindset. Today, believe it or not, every person in the world has an equal opportunity to achieve success in America. One just needs to have the right mindset. I cannot deny that there are some short cuts for some people, and I cannot deny that there are extra hardships for others. However, it is the state of one’s mind that makes the difference, not the journey. Many of the poor have a poor person’s mindset. They blame the government for not doing enough, they blame those who have succeeded for not offering a handout and they blame those around them for not being of enough service to them. Poor people tend to feel hopeless, and they usually remain in their despair. They will have children in hopes that the children will one day succeed and save them from their despicable existence. They refuse to take responsibility for themselves and the situation that they have put themselves in. There are some individuals that live poor, but are not poor mentally because they are happy with the little things in life, but with that mindset, those people are truly not poor. Only financially poor.

Next we have the middle class and the upper middle class. There is not much difference between the two. These classes consist of the individuals and families that live in their little suburban boxes and feel that they are living the American dream. There are also some that feel that what they have is still not enough. In any case, the mindset of those in the middle class is what makes the middle class unique. Most of those in the middle class believe in going through school, going to college and obtaining a degree in a well paying industry. Others in the middle class are hungry. Although they enjoy their comfortable living, or semi comfortable living, they still want more. They either want to stop living paycheck to paycheck, or they simply want to have all the riches and wealth that those of the private sector do. They are ambitious. Some grow up and work towards being an all star athlete, or making their children become all stars. Others work to put a studio in their homes and try to take over the music industry. There are also those who are innovators, and they sit at home and create and invent something new that could be useful to the masses, even if it is as simple and a self cleaning sponge. There are also those who work to build their own businesses, or work hard to be at the top of another business. The down side to the middle class mindset is that there are a lot of “wanna be” people, the ones that want everything, but do not want to put in the work for it. They are the ones that sit at home, watch television and allow themselves to become so brainwashed by what is being shown to them that they try to emulate what they see and believe that their media molded mindset is what will bring them easy greatness. Although the mindset varies, the outcome is often limited.

Finally we have the upper class and private sector. Those who have always had the mindset “don’t stop until it’s done”. They are the ones who were bred of ambition and live, eat, breathe and sleep success. They have the mindset that they are kings and queens. Often times they actually are. The key to this mindset is that they know that they will be hated. They know that they will be envied. They know that much will be sacrificed. They know that they will more than likely be alone. It does not matter how many fans they have, or how many paid friends they have. They know that the top is lonely, and they are not afraid of that.

The main issue with mindset is that most people depend on the approval of their peers. They need the gratification of knowing that their families and friends approve of what they have said or done. People are often too worried about what people will like, instead of what they themselves enjoy. Many have their priorities out of order because they want to participate in being one of those who go to the club every weekend and buy out the VIP section, as glorified in their favorite song. Many watch television and see that exploitation of their lives is the way to get rich. Too many individuals listen to today’s degrading music and believe that working in strip clubs, hanging out in the studio, outwardly expressing one’s slutty habits, doing drugs and drinking lots of alcohol is the way to live life. There are way too many followers in the world. There is no sense of knowing oneself and being comfortable enough with oneself to express one’s inner beauty and talents. Those who are successful do what they love to do, and they never stop doing it. They never allow the ridicule and criticism of others to destroy their dreams. They do not look to the media or their peers for the best “get rich quick” scheme. Those who are successful look inside of themselves. They take responsibility for their own lives, and they learn from their mistakes. Those who succeed are not afraid to fail. Every failure is another step toward success. Every critique is advice for improvement. Every “hater” is a person that is envious of the fact that one is willing to continue to push forward.

No one keeps us down more than we keep ourselves down. No one hinders us from achieving the greatness that we were born with but us. We are the ones that allow the opinions of others to tear us apart. We are the ones that tell ourselves we can’t when deep down we know that we can. We are the ones who are afraid of ourselves. We are afraid to face our fears. We are afraid to face our own souls. We are afraid to admit the we are wrong and that we need improvement. We degrade ourselves and glorify being judgmental hypocrites. We choose to be trashy instead of classy. We choose to fail instead of continuing until we succeed. We choose to lose instead of win. All of life is about mindset. I have set my mind on winning. Where is your mind? What is it set on? Either change your mind and change your life, or believe and achieve.

The Owl (7/29/2011)

Li Owl

The owl. In Greek mythology, the owl is associated with the Goddess Athena representing wisdom. The owl is also associated with mystery and the spirit world, as it is a nocturnal bird. The owl is also believed to represent inner light and knowledge of the world, physical and spiritual. On the other hand, the Romans believed the owl to be an omen. The owl, to them, was a sign of death or destruction. Many Catholics and Christians believe in this negative connotation of the symbolism of the owl to this day. I, however, and with the Greeks. The owl represents wisdom and mystery. The owl is a connection between the darkness and the light. The owl is solitary and nocturnal, flying through the night silently. I love and respect the owl, as I share some of the same qualities.

I am a nocturnal person. I can sleep the day away with no problem, and be awake and ready for life all night. I love the night time, as it is the time that is associated with darkness and mystery. No matter how hard I try, I am never truly able to sleep through a whole night. I awaken at some point. Even though I cannot see clearly, I do see decently at night. Over the years I have claimed to have “night vision” when someone asks me “Why are you walking in the dark?” or “Why are you doing this or that in the dark?” Like the owl, I tend to stay to myself. Although company is nice, I prefer to be to myself in my mind in my own world. When I am around others, I am quiet and observant. I move swiftly, and often quietly, unless I am wearing heels or some other form of noisy shoe.

I also possess a wisdom about life that others cannot seem to understand. Many often feel that because they are older than I am, that they know much more about life and I could never be able to understand the things that they do. These individuals put up a wall around them, not allowing me to truly feel their soul. That is fine. My natural intellect is not based on what we are taught in textbooks. What I am able to put together from life is not limited to my life experiences alone. I do not know everything, but I  am able to look at a situation objectively and make sense of it. I am able to step outside of my own body and see life through the eyes of someone else. I am able to feel another person’s pain and feel out his or her train of thinking. I am then, able to devise a solution to a problem or give meaningful advice. This wisdom has been embedded in my soul, and I only need to open myself up to my own inner knowledge to access it.

In addition to those qualities, I have a unique connection to the spirit world. While staying with family in New York, I had an experience in which a voice with no body called my name from the staircase. No one else in the house was awake at the time. There was a time in that same house in which I was having a phone conversation with a friend, and there seemed to be a voice attempting to come though on the call. The call suddenly ended. At home in Stone Mountain, Ga, there was once a time when random articles of clothing appeared in my mother’s home. I placed these pieces on the top of the couch and went into the dining room, which is openly connected to living room. When I came around the corner through the kitchen back to the living room, the clothing was then on the floor as if someone had thrown them on the floor. No one had moved around the house during that time. I live with and love the spirits that exist around us. The fact that we cannot see the angels and demons that guide us through life does not mean that they are not there.

I am slightly obsessed with death as it is a part of life. Many believe that life begins and ends. Life is a cycle. We live in a physical realm, and then we move on to live in the spiritual realm. Some individuals live in both the physical and spiritual realm simultaneously. I applaud their openness to the world and the cosmos. I am the owl. I am the one that is worshiped at the Bohemian Grove every year, or so the conspiracy theorists say. I am the one who holds the light and is not afraid of the darkness. I am the one who some praise, and others fear. I am the one whose memories will haunt you in your sleep, if you dare to believe I am evil. I am the one who sits is the trees and watches over you. I speak only when it is needed. I live in the night, and I respect the dead.  I love the light of the Moon and I am connected with it. I am the one who is heavily misunderstood, yet often respected. I am loathed, and I am loved. I am connected, and I am aware. I hunt my prey at night, for I am as unique as what I eat. It is I. I am. The Owl.

Participating (7/28/2011)

Individuals. Individuals are unique. Each individual has his or her own different experience. Each individual has his or her own story to tell. Not all stories get told. I ride public transportation. Each day I spend four hours commuting to and from work, or any given location for that matter, and I often enjoy it. Although the commute consumes most of my day, there are always different individuals to observe, each person, in his or her own space, going through his or her day-to-day routine. Thanks to social networking, I am also able to interact with various individuals from all walks of life at any time of the day. Individuals are so different, yet they are all the same.

For starters, during my daily commute, I see everyone in the world. I see the bus driver that is unhappy with his or her job. I see the overtired student who is trying to get to catch a quick nap whilst taking a long commute to school, or the student who is trying to get in a quick cram session before his or her test. I see the nurse that is dreading her 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. shift. I see the God fearing man who puts on a smile everyday in the name of Jesus Christ and his lord God, because he knows he hates his job. I see an old co-worker, still making his was to Lenox Square Mall to sort and replenish panties. Then, a man in a wheelchair has to board the bus, the young ladies in the front look around as if they are flustered about having to move from their seats. Another man, on his way to go clean airplanes, is annoyed with the fact that we have to sit and for the man in the wheelchair to be secured onto the bus. After we get moving again, a young man who wants to be hood rap star when he grows up, gets on the bus and walks straight to the back. He is proud of the fact that he is on his way to go see his probation officer, and talks to his girlfriend on his cell phone as if he is angry about the fact that the police did their job when he was slipping up. But of course, he also plays it cool.

On the train, I see the woman taking her daughters to school. I see the many sleeping faces that are trying to catch a quick nap be fore work. There are a few loud teenagers that are excited about going to their first job, Six Flags. I also see the young man that just got out of jail and is now looking for work. Next to him is a female with two children, praying that she makes it to her WIC appointment on time. I also observe the African- American woman that has an iPad and a well paying administrative job. She pays her own bills and wears a Gucci purse, that she bought out of someone’s trunk for $20, and feels that she is the richest woman in the world. No one can tell her anything, especially since she has just gotten her hair done. At the end of the rail car, there is a couple, a Caucasian female that looks like she gets beaten by her African- American boyfriend. The black eye gives it away. Across from them, is the elderly woman, saddened by the fact that she still goes to work because she has to, not because she wants to. In the middle of the train, there is a young man and his daughter, he has no clue what to do with a girl, but he does his best. Across from him, is the young girl who is mad at the world because she got pregnant at a young age, and the father of her child is nowhere to be found.

At my checkpoint, also known as Five Points, I see the homeless man that walks up and down the platform everyday. He is always begging for money, and always looking somewhat presentable. There is also the military veteran with no tongue, walking up and down the platform yelling and pointing at his Bible, and other people. There are many businessmen and women, waiting on their train, some nurses here, and students there. They are many mall employees, ready to go sell. On the next train, there is the account executive, proud of her accomplishments. She also spikes her coffee because she can’t smoke a cigarette on the train, and there are more people sleeping, trying to get that 15-minute nap in.

Here go the gays. So happy and flamboyant, they are ready to get the day. Standing tall with their heads held high, some of them are giggling wildly and making a scene. Too much reality TV for them; they think they need a camera. Next to the happy people are the hood rats, the ones who act like they were raised with no home training. They act as if they are slaves just now able to get out into the world. They tend to have a high and mighty attitude, because they have just gotten the opportunity to have something of material value. They look around at everyone else with faces of disgust, when actually, they are the one who are disgusting, in their presentation, and in their soul.

At work, there are the managers that all feel that they are important because they have a decent salary in fashion retail. There is the crazy manager that everyone hates, the laid back manager that everyone loves, and the two managers that are in the middle. There is the drama between managers because no one want to listen to anyone else; all Chiefs, no Indians. There are the associates that feel they are important because they do not work at McDonald’s. There is the one associate that wishes he was the boss, but he knows he can’t handle the job. In the back is the associate that just wants to get a paycheck, nothing really matters to him or her. Motley crew if anything.

On Facebook and Twitter, the characters are more interesting. There is the female that has found her center and her happiness and feels like she needs to look down upon anyone that is not “on her level”. This includes randomly judging and cutting off old friends from years ago. There are the single mothers venting and complaining about deadbeat fathers. There are the up and coming musicians. A lot of them as well, and they are all promoting their latest mix tape. I also find the up and coming models that feel the best way to get into the industry is to be a knock off Victoria’s Secret model. I also observe the many promoters, that flood your screen with party invites to events that most people won’t attend. Then next morning, they brag about the huge turn out. I scroll own my screen and I see posts from celebrities, I take a good look and realise that they really are just regular people. Other celebrities post about various things in life that excite them, or promote some huge event that they will be attending, subliminally telling the people the their paycheck depends on a good turn out. A-list musicians make posts about their tour. They love to make everyone feel like they were there. I find the celebrity bloggers, and other vloggers that post their opinions about everything going on with other people because they know people are nosy. Also, there are the many people that are obsessed with other people because there is nothing interesting about them to be interested in. One these sites, I also see all of the bad break ups and the great make-ups. I see the people that are really irate at an ex, or they are depressed about seeing their ex move on. I see the souls of people on these sites. People put it all out there. Even when the message is subliminal, I can still feel what that person is going through.

Last but not least, there are the people I know personally. Including the ones that are insecure and try to cover it up by pointing out my insecurities. The friends that always flake on me, but always call me when they need something. The cousin that always invites me over,  just to find out information and talk badly about me behind my back. I have the one ex that I am a still friend to, but causes awkward moments when she flirts with me. The one friend that is insecure and I can hear it in her voice. I have a friend that likes me, but I don’t know the right way to say that I do not like him. I know my parent who is always going to find a way to treat me like I am 12 years old. I have the family member that is a failure. I know the drug addict that recovered and is staying strong. I love the guy who always ignores me, but it is only because I am not expressing myself the way he wants me to. I know the other guy that only wants to have sex with me. I communicate with the hip-hop artist that is on his way to the top and promotes the “hood rich image”. I know the young man who has money because he lucked up in the music industry, but has forgotten what it is like to talk to a regular person that is broke. I have been infatuated with they guy that wants to be somebody in the industry; he is a jack-of-all-trades, yet he has not accomplished to much. He is the one that puts on a front for whomever he knows and meets, knowing that he has really gotten nowhere. He presents himself to be “that guy”, when in reality, he is a “wanna be”. I know the females that focus too much on me and what everyone else is doing or what we look like or how we are presenting ourselves. They do nothing but project their own demons of insecurities on other because they are afraid to face their own souls.

Take a second and think about your life. Think about the people you know and interact with on a daily basis. Do you not see the same thing I see? There is a man on the corner with that same empty cup, but wearing a fresh and new outfit. Do you donate to the cause? We all go through our day-to-day routines and see the same thing, for the most part. We generally see the same people. We all do the same nothing about it. Even those who have donated millions to various charities have at one point walked passed a begging woman on the street.

Most people drive in their cars, to and from any location. They feel that this is freedom, but it is actually solitary confinement. Those who live in their cars don’t see the motley group of people on the train. They don’t see the sad, hopeless faces of those who work a real dead end job. They have not seen the couple who is happy with taking the bus simply because they are on the bus together, knowing they may never be able to afford a car. They have not experienced the true effect of the media and the industry on society. They all live in a dream world, especially those who claim to be ever so happy with their existences because they don’t want their “haters” to see them is a negative state. We have all participated in portraying ourselves to be someone we are not, this does include the moments in which we say we are “fine” when actually the world is coming down around us. However, we all take it upon ourselves to look at the next person and project our demons onto that person. We see an innocent victim, and we attack. We take our pride and put it before all. Our egos consume us and we must chastise the person that rides the train. We put ourselves on a pedestal, and don’t give the person without a high paying job a chance at love. We create a dream world in our heads and feel that we are actually better than the person that lives in the homeless shelter. It is that same person reading this post, saying to him or herself “I am a God fearing person, and I judge no one.”, just to turn around and judge someone else for living in a messy home.

Some of those reading this have frowned at that last sentence. For what? Who are you to feel some kind of way about how someone else lives? Who are you to think that you are important enough in this world that your opinion really matters? Why are you so insecure about yourself that you have to find the smallest thing about a person that you deem wrong or unfit, and seek to make a debacle out of it all? You are no one. I am no one. We are not more important than the grains of dirt we walk on everyday. We are simply humans, Homo sapiens. We are mammals. We are honestly no greater than the pets we abuse on a daily basis. Yet, we still take our frustrations out on one another and treat one another as if one of us could truly be better than the other. What the hell is wrong with people?

I always wonder, What is really going on? Why do people really behave the way they do? What is going on at home? What has happened in this person’s life? There are many answers, and even more questions where those came from. We as a human race have lost touch with reality. Reality TV does not help as people get to live in their homes and watch others live life for them. I love the fact that I do not drive. I am able to experience the world. I am able to participate in life. I am able to give that smile to a random stranger that needed it that day, instead of writing about it on Facebook. I am able to give up my seat for an elderly person on the bus, instead of riding past him or her and just glancing at the fact that the elderly person has to wait 35 minutes in 100-degree weather because the bus ran early. I am able to see the real looks on people’s faces as they ride the train to that big presentation in the downtown office. I am able to experience the fact that there are people outside of those bank accounts. There are real people in those suits, there are real people in the streets, and there are real people who make money off of pretending to be in the streets. There is more to life than chasing countless amounts of meaning less paper, having sex with as many easily fooled people as possible and going to lavish parties one may or may not be able afford to host. Participating in life and seeing the inside story is more than doing community service every once in a while. Have you had a chat with a homeless person before? Have you taken someone into your home? I am fully aware of the world and what is really going on. Can you honestly say that you are as well? Are you truly participating? Look in the mirror; tell yourself the truth.